Well, I've done it again. I've let life's changes interrupt my spiritual life. Don't get me wrong - I've prayed and thanked God for several things, but I still feel disconnected. And it shows. I am quickly angered by little things. My patience level is low. The words out of my mouth are not loving, but rather snippy. My thoughts consist more of to-do lists instead of meditations on the Lord.
Throughout scripture, we are reminded to remember the Lord - His deeds, miracles, commands, and words. When I've read these scriptures in the past, I've thought to myself, "well, of course, who could forget the Lord?" Now I know from experience. It's not that I've forgotten about Him, but I've neglected Him. Through my negligence though, I have forgotten to praise Him when times are tough and to pray to Him through a difficult situation. At one point this week, I even asked myself "what's wrong with me?" That's when the Spirit reminded me - "You haven't been seeking the Lord."
In Numbers 15:38 - 40, the Israelites are commanded to "make tassels on the corners of your garments with a blue cord on each tassel. You will have these tassels to look at and so you will remember all the commands of the LORD, that you may obey them...(NIV)" That gives me an idea - make something to physically remind me of the LORD and his commands and to stay connected.
Staying connected requires more than just a reminder though, it requires work on my part. I need to set apart time for prayer and worship, meditation on the LORD and His words, and reflection. I need to do what Brother Lawrence did - practice the presence of God. I need to seek the Lord.
I can't wait for my life to settle down before practicing His presence because life may never settle down. In fact, as the past few weeks have shown me, I need to stay connected to the Lord at all times. Otherwise it's not pretty.